Bad dream = husband in dog house

I am quite a deep sleeper and most of the time I do dream but it is hit and miss how much I remember. Sometimes it can just be the odd flashback but other times they are so vivid and real. So much so, that I have the occasional ‘night terror’. Anyone who has experienced these knows how awful they are and how real they are. I end up waking up sweating and either crying, screaming or having a panic attack! They are normally something horrendous about my family or loved ones and something bad happening to them. So maybe this reflects my deepest and darkest fear, what if something happened to any of my family/husband? I couldn’t cope with that. Especially my mum, she has been there for me so closely through all my dark times, how would I function without her?

Luckily last night’s dream wasn’t that kind of ‘night terror’ but it was horrible. It was very long, detailed and real. I woke up and looked at my husband in a different way, I was angry, upset, suspicious and appalled. Why was he in bed next to me? How had I allowed that to happen? After everything he has put me through – am I that weak? It took me a while to come around… ok it was a dream… phew… but is this a sign? Are there suspicions in my subconscious I am now aware of? Is this a premonition?

He asks me why I am being weird…

“You cheated on me… an affair for 20 months actually” (precise figure given in my dream from the bitch he was seeing) and his response…

“Was she fit?”

REALLY??!! That is your response?! Not – babe you know I’d never cheat on you, don’t worry its not real! He wanted to know if she was fit – he had grasped onto the one place he could ever cheat – in my dreams! (btw in his dreams is unacceptable!)

So – he – is – in – the – doghouse! Partly because of the betrayal and hurt that took place in my dream. He had been acting funny and smiling when I questioned him which indicates he could be lying. I found a random address on a scrap bit of paper and I went to find it. When I get there it is a nice house, the door is open, I slowly walk in. There isn’t any furniture, but there are decorating materials around and I hear voices coming from a room at the back of the house. I find an older couple and a brunette girl painting the kitchen walls. “Hi I am Jack’s wife”, it is almost as if it happens in slow motion… she drops her paint brush… then Jack walks in, sees me and his face drops.

We are married with 2 children, I feel like I have just been punched in the stomach, the overwhelming hurt and betrayal takes over my body and I can’t breathe.

The aftermath of the discovery continues in my dream and I live through it and feel it all for real in my heart. Of course when I wake up these emotions are all still real and I feel like I can’t even look at him. It is irrational, it is not fair, he in reality has done nothing wrong BUT he is still in the dog house – HOW DARE he cheat on me in my dream and shatter the life we have created together.

We both go off to work, he tentatively kisses me goodbye - I turn my head away. Let’s see if the reality of the day helps the dream to wear off and he can come back into the house as normal tonight.